How to be happy NOW.

A concept I've been sitting heavy on is the fact that we have only ever been ourselves. You have never experienced anything from anyone's perspective except your own. For me it gave me a deeper insight as to how empathy is a game changer in so many ways. It is a MAJOR TOOL to not only connect with others but to get rid of judgement.

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Feeling lost? Read this.

In a world with information overload and the opportunity to act as your own PR person and literally curate a personality you can monetize it is easy to see why many people feel lost in the "real world". For a long time I had huge benchmarks in my mind for when I should have a certain amount of money, own my own business, should be traveling, etc etc. I realized this kind of thinking not only overwhelmed me I often ended up feeling disappointed when I didn't hit a certain goal by a certain time.

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How to get rid of your Limiting Beliefs.

A limiting belief can have devastating effects on us. I remember the seizure that made me loose my front teeth made me incredibly depressed. I already had braces and now I needed to get surgery?? I literally did not smile in pictures for 2 years! I stopped going to auditions. I put so much value on my exterior beauty I neglected my inner spirit. Don't let that be you! Take a moment to think if you have any limiting beliefs? 

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Whatever you believe is true until it is no longer your belief.

When I think about the word "believe" a few things pop into my mind. Most kids at some point believed in Santa Claus. In my case growing up in Holland I believed in zwarte piet (It is people in blackface and it is a pretty controversial topic I will cover in the future) Once I realized these concepts were not real I felt a sense of relief. There isn't some imaginary character keeping tabs on me. But it also introduced me to the power of believing and more importantly our limiting beliefs. 

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How to use guilt to become a better person.

Guilt exists only by us living in the past. Guilt has no life of its own when we live in the present moment! 

Knowing this truth now, when I reflect on the guilt emotion I can clearly remember some classic moments where guilt was used as a toxic tool:  "I will be disappointed if you do X" or "Do you know what I had to sacrifice in order to do X for you?". These types of conversations often take place during our childhood and definitely reappear in our adult relationships, friendships and career. Often it is NOT INTENDED TO MAKE US FEEL BAD.

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One thing you can do everyday to build self-confidence.

This topic is HUGE! Self confidence is needed no matter what industry you are in. It plays a vital role in all parts of our life. Personally I struggled with this from a very young age as I was severely bullied while growing up in Holland. Coming to America I had a very strong WHY which motivated me to want to be successful. I had the "I will prove them wrong" mentality for many years until I realized that it is NOT ABOUT THEM. Feeling good about yourself and feeling confident is an INSIDE JOB!

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How to use judgement in a positive way.

Looking at the act of judgment with this definition really allows us to take a snapshot of where our EQ (emotional intelligence) currently is. I've found myself judging more than ever the last few days... I became aware of it almost immediately but could not help my thoughts. I realize the "process" of judging lies heavily on our own values. If we think someone is not behaving to what we think is acceptable we tend to judge.

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But do you value you?

Self care is a topic that has definitely become "popular" to use lately. However what is it REALLY at its core? When I look at the phrase, I don't just think face masks and bubble baths, I also think pain. 
Often we forget that self care also means self reflection and seeing if perhaps the toxic person is you, yeah YOU!

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Another year around the sun!

Today I turn 34 and it is the first birthday that I feel like I am truly alive. I've experienced the full spectrum of human emotions in the past few months more intensely than any other time before. It has been a great journey of pain, growth and happiness. As I celebrate today, I cant help but reflect on the concept of aging. Personally I look at it in 2 parts. The external and internal.

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Self talk, what are you REALLY saying to yourself?

The way we see ourselves is so vital. It is something I was so blind to for many years not realizing just how loud that voice can be that it will manifest into your reality. You attract what you think about. This is a major reason why being present and in the NOW is so important. It allows you to filter and catch yourself when negative self talk does occur. Another major lesson I've learned is that it is OK to mess up.

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What does self-esteem mean for you?

How often do we deviate from this? I know I've found myself comparing since a young age. Growing up in a household where my dad was a competitive body builder, I constantly felt the need to seek approval and validation wanting to be perfect. On the flipside however, my mom hated fitness and lived a very opposite lifestyle. Certainly a strange way of growing up and I recently discovered just how much that has had an effect on me as an adult. And Social media can create that same distortion!

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Finding Inner Peace

To be unshakable, to be in complete alignment mentally, spiritually, physically and emotionally and to fully trust the NOW. That for me is the definition of Inner Peace. This philosophy is what first introduced me to fully grasp the concept of consciousness and to "Be the watcher".

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A happy life, is a joyful life.

To experience joy I believe is what we all crave as humans. Being able to find your tribe of people you can feel joy with seems like the ultimate bliss. Whether through friendships, family, relationships, your fans, coworkers and so on. To be able to find joy in every situation no matter how small adds up to a happy life.

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